Where Are You Going?

Just before I left Cottingham to begin my wandering, a friend mentioned a quote that he attributed to the mystic, monk and poet Thomas Merton:

When the path ends, the journey begins!

My journey has definitely begun, and very quickly I have become aware of the immensity of the challenge involved, the challenge of leaving well-trodden paths for the road less traveled, especially in these times of a global pandemic, political polarisation, economic instability and climate crisis. 

In 'The Lord of the Rings', J.R.R. Tolkien writes:

Not all who wander are lost.

But I have become aware that after leaving old, pre-determined paths, I am going to need a strong inner compass and helpful waymarkings to guide me if I am not to loose my way.

Thankfully, over the last few years I have committed myself to a number of reflective practices, including meditation, journaling and coaching, that have helped me to develop a clearer sense of my inner compass. What ties all these practices together is that they all involve learning how to listen deeply to yourself, as Parker Palmer writes in 'Let Your Life Speak':

Vocation does not come from willfulness. It comes from listening. I must listen to my life and try to understand what it is truly about - quite apart from what I would like it to be about - or my life will never represent anything real in the world, no matter how earnest my intentions. That insight is hidden in the word vocation itself, which is rooted in the Latin for "voice." Vocation does not mean a goal that I pursue. It means a calling that I hear. Before I can tell my life what I want to do with it, I must listen to my life telling me who I am. I must listen for the truths and values at the heart of my own identity, not the standards by which I must live - but the standards by which I cannot help but live if I am living my own life.

Over the last few years, I have listened deeply to my life and have gained some clarity over the key question that lies at the heart of my being:

What does it mean to be a source of life in a dying world? 

In answer to that question, my sense is that I have a calling to nurture personal, organisational and communal psycho-spiritual growth and development, in a way that is attuned to the wider web of life we are a tiny part of.

I have also come to see that some of my core values are: 

(1) to nurture peace,

(2) to embody depth,

(3) to live with an effortless flow, and

(4) to build community.

So, if that is my inner compass, where am I going?

The truth is, I don't know, but that's the whole point of this wandering. I am on a journey of discovery, into the wild unknown. 

That said, I am already beginning to sense ways forward opening up before me. I have noticed I feel drawn to push on certain doors (some already feeling like they may be beginning to open!), including enrolling on a Post-Graduate training programme in Psychosynthesis and Leadership Coaching and making contact with a Zen teacher to begin training in the Zen tradition. I am also enjoying meeting new people and building up new connections. 

When the path ends, the journey begins.

Amen to that!